Sacrifices
by samijae
Summary: Crisscolfer fic: Darren Criss is living a lie. He has learned to shrug off the truth, not because he is ashamed of it, but because he believes he has a job to do, and he is the only one willing to do it. But what happens when he can't hold it in anymore? Darren still realizes that the job he's taken on is imensly important, but is it worth it to sacrifice his own life for his image
1. Chapter 1

"_Why did you pick me to sing that song with?"_

_Kurt's words filled the nearly-empty Dalton Academy choir room, followed by a brief silence. Blaine's gaze lingered at Kurt for a long moment, before he closed his eyes and drew a deep breath. This was it._

"_Kurt, there is a moment." He opened his eyes after a few seconds and met Kurt's questioning stare. "When you say to yourself… 'Oh, there you are! I've been looking for you forever.'"_

_Kurt watched Blaine in silence, eyes flicking across Blaine's face, as if he, too, was wondering if this was truly happening or not. Blaine's heart beat sped up as he shifted in his seat and took Kurt's hand into his own, continuing the confession that had been tearing at his insides for the past few days, desperate for a way out. "Watching you do 'Blackbird' this week, that was the moment for me… about you."_

_Kurt's expression didn't change; he was still curiously watching Blaine, urging him with his eyes to continue. Blaine took in a shaky breath, closed his eyes again, and finished his speech. "You _move_ me, Kurt. And this duet would just be an excuse to spend more time with you."_

_Blaine opened his eyes. Kurt's face had finally changed, now streaked with many different emotions: bewilderment, joy, _relief. _It was as if something in those bright blue-as-day eyes were shooting off mini fireworks inside, and Kurt's entire expression seemed to say, _'Finally!'

_Blaine didn't realized what he had been doing until after he'd stood up, cupped Kurt's face with his left hand, bent down and pressed their lips together. Thoughts passed through his mind at a million miles a second, so many ideas zoomed before his eyes that he practically forgot to _breathe_. So that's what he focused on throughout the kiss, trying to ignore his overactive mind, the thoughts swirling together on how right this was, how amazing, how perfect. He tried to ignore the fact that Kurt was now kissing back, his own left hand coming up to caress Blaine's face, how he knew Kurt had known about this thing that existed between them for far longer than Blaine had. But god, he was right, this was it. This was _him_, the boy he had been looking for all his life._

_After what felt like forever in this blissful state, the boys finally pulled apart. Their eyes opened and met once again as Kurt's hand hit the table with a satisfying _thump_ and Blaine sat back down in his chair. They breathed (more like panted) in perfect silence, trying to catch up with their own minds. They were both mesmerized by the beauty of it all: the heat that settled between them, the slight tingle that still lingered on their lips, the intensity of their locked gazes and, most powerfully, the overwhelming sense of unbreakable _lov_—_

"CUT!" The director practically screamed, making both actors on the set jump. Darren blinked as he came back to real life. He could practically _feel_ the Blaine mask coming off, mentally storing it into his imaginary box labeled 'CHARACTERS'. He shook his head slightly and sighed with exhaustion, looking up across the antique Dalton Academy set table at Chris, who seemed to be doing the same thing in his head: taking himself out of character and slipping back into his normal self.

Darren watched as Chris' Kurt mask came off and revealed the true actor beneath. Only, Chris didn't seem nearly as exhausted as Darren did. This is, unfortunately, because of the fact that when he took the Blaine mask off, it wasn't for the intention of going back to his regular self. Instead, Darren automatically replaced his Glee character with a different persona altogether, one only he knew of. It was the biggest secret he could ever remember having, and some days he wished he could tell someone, get it off his chest that he was literally living a lie, but he knew he couldn't.

Darren Criss had a job to do.


	2. Chapter 2

Darren was walking out into the Paramount Studios lot towards his trailer, updating his Twitter on his phone, when he practically ran into Chris. It was Monday morning, they had just finished wrapping up the episode "Pot O Gold" the previous Saturday, and everyone was rushing around the studios, preparing to shoot the next episode.

"Hey, Chr—"

"Have you read the new script yet?" Chris interrupted him hurriedly, his voice higher than usual. Darren blinked, stunned at his co-star's sudden urgency. Chris was usually pretty laid back, but today he looked very high strung and nervous, his eyes wide and his complexion much paler than normal. It was as if he had just been told the Glee set resided on a mind field.

He had to admit, Chris looked adorable when he was nervous. His eyes sparkled when he widened them and his hair flopped a little out onto his forehead, fighting the hair product that attempted to keep his bangs in place, and… Darren shook his head a little to try to keep the thoughts out of his head and concentrate on why Chris was acting so strange. "Uh—no, I haven't, why?"

Chris took in a deep, shaky breath and looked down at the ground, and Darren noticed a light shade of pink dusting across the younger man's cheeks, which did nothing to help keep those thoughts away. "Just, ah… read it first. We'll talk about it on set. And we may have to… convince Ryan not to… I don't know, just read it, and hurry. I'll meet you on set in an hour." And then Chris was gone, rushing past Darren toward his trailer. It wasn't until Chris' trailer door slammed shut that Darren remembered where he was. He took off again for his own trailer and, once inside and settled down, finally took the script out of his bag and began to read.

It had been nearly eight months since "Original Song" had aired, eight months since Chris and Darren shared their first Klaine kiss. Darren was still living a lie, of course; he had no choice. He had come so close to telling someone about it over the months, but he stayed strong. Besides, once Season 2 had ended and the summer began, the Glee Tour sucked all the remaining time and energy out of him. It wasn't a bad thing, he had realized sometime during the summer; going on tour with the Glee cast required him to focus 99% on his performances every day, which meant for nearly all day every day, he was Blaine Anderson, openly gay teen and boyfriend of Kurt Hummel on Glee. This left only 1% of his day to be "himself", or the man that everyone thought he was. Needless to say, Darren loved being on tour the entire summer. He didn't have to lie about who he was so much then, and he could always use Blaine as an escape from his own reality, so he didn't need to worry so much about his true self that summer.

Unfortunately, the Glee Tour inevitably came to an end, and the normal Glee season picked up again, which meant Darren had to take off the Blaine mask regularly each day after work. It was only the beginning of shooting the 5th episode, and he was already exhausted from hiding, much worse than he could ever remember. Maybe it was because he missed the freedom of not caring during the tour, and he wanted that feeling back so desperately, he repeatedly had to snap himself back to reality every day just to keep himself from blurting out the truth. Chris was the only person that kept him grounded, even though he had no idea what Darren was hiding. But all Darren knew was he loved spending time with Chris, loved talking to him, loved the feeling of _almost_ being able to be himself around someone. However, he also envied Chris, and how he could be so honest with the world about who he was. He didn't have anything he needed to prove to anyone. God, Chris was lucky.

Now Darren was sprawled across the bed in his trailer, reading the script for the episode titled "The First Time". He was already a little hesitant about it after his encounter with Chris, and the title of the episode was not helping in the least. _What on Earth are the writers doing with this one? _He couldn't help but think. He flipped the page and began skimming only the scenes that had him or Chris in them. Words and dialogue raced before his eyes as his heart began to thump harder in his chest, realizing what this episode was about, what was coming, why Chris seemed hysterical in the parking lot.

…"_This song is about sexual awakening...have either of you two actually…?"…._

…"_I'm waiting for the right time."…._

…"_Don't you think _now_ is the time to be adventurous?"…_

…"_Hey, Kurt, let's just do it, I want you so bad."…_

…"_I don't want to do it on a night that you spent half of dancing with another guy!"…_

…"_You were right; our first time shouldn't be like that. I was drunk and I'm sorry."…_

…"_I want to go to your house."…_

Darren's eyes were nearly popping out of his sockets and his heart was racing by the time he finished reading the script, having re-read it about three times and pinching himself just to make sure he wasn't dreaming. _Is this _really_ happening?_ He thought. _Are the writers crazy? Is Ryan crazy? Oh god, what about the fans, the critics, and every single person that knows Glee exists? Once this airs, _everyone_ will go crazy! It will be all over news, the internet, people will be raving and gushing and _outraging_ over 'that episode from that show that depicts two teen couples, one straight and one _gay_, HAVING SEX'! _

Darren lay back on his bed, tossing the script to the floor and rubbing his hands over his face, trying to control his rapid breathing. Wow. All the predictions and fanfics and drawings that fans had been submitting to the internet ever since Blaine appeared in Season 2 were about to become a reality. Not only that, but all the complaints and the arguments and the hatred spewed out towards the new gay relationship on Glee would rise to a peak after seeing this. It had been horrible after the kiss; no one would shut up about it for weeks, and the internet just turned into a big Liberal-LGBT-Community-Supporters- V. -Conservative-Homophobic-Haters online fight. Darren himself had received everything from over-the-top-fan-mail to death threats in the weeks following that episode. But this… this episode was going to be SO much more controversial. Darren actually felt himself getting light headed just trying to imagine how much the media world will blow up because of this. And the worst part is that the biggest arguments won't be about the fact that the couples having sex are teenagers; no, this would be about the gay guys' storyline. Obviously. After all, conservatives probably couldn't care less if it were just Finchel doing it. Oh, but _Klaine!?_ THAT was absolutely unacceptable.

Taking deep breaths, Darren's heartbeat gradually went back to normal, and he tried to convince himself he was overreacting. It's just a TV show, after all. It's not like this thing is actually happening between the actors; that's all it is, it's acting. Surely people can understand that. This is a fictional representation of real-life teenagers in high school. It's no secret that they are having sex, so why should it be so bad to reference that in a television show about high school?

_Yeah_, Darren thought. _It's going to be alright. Sure, people will complain, but the fans will love it. And that's all that matters, is the fans._ Smiling to himself, Darren finally left his bed and got ready to go to the set. He showered quickly and dried his hair before changing into his Blaine clothes and stepping out his trailer door towards the makeup studio. _Everything will be fine._

Everything was NOT fine.

Darren and Chris were on the set of Blaine's room. It was Saturday, the last day of filming for this episode, and they were about to shoot the last scene. _The_ scene. And Darren could not be more nervous.

Chris looked over at him from his actor's chair and chuckled at Darren's obvious nervousness. Surprisingly, Chris had quickly gotten over the initial shock of shooting this particular episode. After Ryan pulled him aside to talk about it the first day of shooting, Chris had seemed to be at ease about the storyline ever since, like Ryan had convinced him that no one was _actually_ going to try to kill him after this episode aired.

Darren, however, was the one freaking out now. The bedroom set was warm-looking, with low lighting and fresh covers and sheets spread on the bed and soft music playing in the background. The whole thing made Darren jittery, nearly enough to lose his lunch.

"Darren," Chris said, bringing Darren out of his own thoughts and back to the bedroom set. "It's going to be ok. It's not like we're going to be naked or anything, and we really don't have to do anything. We're just going to lie there." Darren sighed and smiled back at him half-heartedly, nodding at his words. Chris was trying to calm him down, and it almost worked, had his words not been followed by the director telling them that they were about to start.

_This is it, _he thought as he and Chris walked over to the bed. The scene that everyone has been either been waiting for or dreading was finally here. Darren honestly didn't know where he stood on this: he desperately wanted the world to regard gay couples as normal, and he wanted the absolute best for Klaine, so in that sense, this was a good scene for him. But on the other hand, Darren was still keeping a secret. A secret that would probably not be kept for long after this very scene was shot.

Darren had never been on a bed with a man before, not like this. Sure, he and his friends would flop onto his bed in college or wherever and watch movies or just hang out. But never had he actually _laid_ down with a man like this, with full on eye contact, faces close enough that his nose rubbed gently against Chris'. The other man's hand lay peacefully on Darren's shoulder, and Darren took Chris' wrist into his own right hand. They stayed like that, giving each other nervous this-is-it smiles until the director called out, "ACTION!"

_Darren looked up at his co-star, his friend, and Chris gazed blissfully back at him, blue orbs shining in the low light. He rubbed his nose against Chris', eliciting a small smile across the younger man's lips. Darren smiled back, relaxing into the warmth of the bed underneath him and the body next to him. He suddenly took great comfort of the hand resting on his shoulder, and squeezed Chris' wrist a little tighter. Darren felt aware of every touch, every little connection between their bodies, from the feather light rubbing of their noses, to the softness of their hands, down to where their knees were stacked on top of each other. _Not enough_, Darren thought. He was not close enough to this boy, this beautiful man lying next to him, and before he could stop himself he leaned in and pressed a gentle kiss to Chris' lips._

_Chris kissed back almost instantly, as Darren knew he would. Their lips slid softly against each other's and both let out relaxed sighs into the other's mouth. Darren opened his mouth a little wider and tilted his head a little off the bed, creating the perfect angle for better access, and dipped his tongue slowly into Chris' mouth, who let out a moan so soft, only Darren could hear. Chris sucked on his tongue a little as Darren continued to close the space between their bodies, letting go of Chris' wrist and finding purchase on the little strip of skin exposed under Chris' white T-shirt. Darren pulled Chris' hips towards him with both his hands until he was close enough that he could wrap is arms around Chris' waist. _

_Chris brought his hands up to cup around Darren's face, sliding them slowly up to run through his curls, all the while deepening the kiss, if possible. Darren moaned into Chris' mouth as their tongues swirled together. His hands stroked lightly along Chris' back, making Chris arch into his touch. Darren arched too, and for a split second it was the most amazing thing in the world. Their hips met, and both could feel the other's growing desire, a desire that had been shoved away into the back of their minds for far too long only to finally be brought out by these simple touches, these passionate kisses, the way they slotted against each other almost too perfectly, like two people connected by the strongest force known to mankind, the undeniable force of lov—_

"CUT!"

Darren blinked, jumping a little at the harsh word, and quickly unwrapped himself from Chris before realizing something. He froze when it hit him. Usually, after the director called for action, the Blaine mask came up immediately and Darren would switch automatically to his 'actor' form. But this time, when the director yelled "CUT", the mask didn't come off like usual. In fact, he realized, he had accidentally forgotten to tune into his inner Blaine form.

That entire performance had been Darren, the _real_ Darren, and when he looked up into Chris' eyes, Darren could tell that he knew it too.

_Shit._


	3. Chapter 3

Chris ran inside and shut the door to his trailer before finally remembering to breathe. Well… _that_ was something. He and Darren had just finished wrapping up the last scene of the episode "The First Time", and from the moment the director yelled "CUT!", to his currently slumped residence against his locked steel trailer door exactly three minutes later (he powerwalked), neither Chris' mind nor body could even slightly begin to register _whatthefuckjusthappened. _

Chris tried desperately to control his rapid breathing as he stiffly moved away from the door and began pacing, but as his breaths smoothed out and his brain slowly started working again, it was his heartbeat's turn to over exaggerate itself. What. The. _Fuck?_

One minute, everything on set was normal; he and Darren were lying on Blaine's bed, and _he_ was the one trying to get Darren to calm his nerves about the scene. One little scene! And it was an innocent scene if taken out of context; without the previous mentions of having sex, it wasn't even an R rated scene, but if anything at all, PG-13 only because of the fact that they were in bed together. Fully clothed, even! So why, _why _did Chris have to frantically run off the set the second the director released him to hide his sudden _hard-on?!_

Ok, he knew why. He wasn't blind, after all. Chris had been aware of what Darren could possibly make him feel from the moment he laid eyes on him, back when they were filming "Never Been Kissed". Chris was already aware that he was gay, and that day, he was _very much_ aware that Darren Criss was possibly the sexiest man he had seen in his life. And who could blame him for such thoughts? It became a well-known fact ever since Blaine's first appearance on the show: if you are attracted to men, you are _extremely_ attracted to Darren Criss.

But ever since that first day of working with him, Chris had always respected Darren's sexuality, and actually found that the two of them made great friends. Best friends, even, and never had Chris wanted to damage that relationship, to screw it up with Darren forever. Their friendship was incredibly important to both of them, and for both their sakes, Chris had become accustomed to immediately banning every and all thoughts of how attracted he was to Darren, how amazing it would be if Darren was his, what they could do with each other, _to_ each other—No, he always banned any fantasies or urges from his mind about Darren, sacrificed all the feelings he had for him in order to keep the friendship that he relied on most, the one closest to his heart that he would never do anything to harm…

Until now.

Now, Chris couldn't keep his mind from racing about Darren: the gorgeous outline of his face, those soft-glowing ember eyes seeking into his own, the curve of a shy but loving smile spreading perfectly across his lips, and—oh, his _lips_, sliding so gently against his own, parting for that incredible tongue to find its way into his mouth and make him moan, make him want more, _need more—_

"AARRRGGHH!" Chris cried out in frustration, literally banging his head on the trailer wall in a lousy attempt to get those images out of his head. Darren was his _friend_, for god's sake! THIS WASN'T HOW NORMAL PEOPLE ARE SUPPOSED TO THINK ABOUT THEIR FRIENDS!

And, oh _god_, Darren knew. Chris could see it in his eyes after their lips parted and both had looked at each other, and Darren _knew._ He was totally aware of Chris' true feelings towards him now, how could he not be?He could tell by the way Chris had kissed back so quickly, how he'd put everything he had into the passion and the heat that had swirled around them in those short but everlasting moments on that bed. Chris could see the realization hit Darren the second their eyes met after that scene. _Oh shit,_ Darren's face had said, and now Chris needed to stop these thoughts from flowing freely, fight them down to the very back of his mind and quickly, before he either lost his friendship with his co-star or he went insane.

Chris stopped pacing and sat down on the bed, closed his eyes, and breathed. He could still hear his heart thumping madly in his ears, but he ignored it as the minutes passed and was successful in at least slowing his breathing again. He opened his eyes after a few moments and sighed. Finally, after about twenty minutes of pure insanity, it seemed he now regaining control over his own thoughts. Soon his mind allowed the images to be transported to that place in the back of his mind, just like he knew they would eventually, and be stored at least temporarily, but hopefully forever.

As the last of those thoughts were stowed away, Chris realized it was going to be alright. He would eventually have to talk to Darren, but all he had to do was deny any feelings he had shown for him in that scene. He was an incredible actor, after all, and he was sure Darren would believe him. _Thank god_, he thought. He was _not _about to lose the most important relationship in his life at the moment, even if it wasn't his ideal type of relationship... But that didn't matter. What mattered was that he and Darren would be ok.

Chris jumped about ten feet at the sudden knock at the door due to the nerves that had apparently not yet calmed down. He shook his head a little bit, cursing at himself for being so skittish, and got up to answer the door. He'd barely turned the handle when Darren flew passed him and into his trailer, leaving Chris staring wide-eyed out the door for a couple of seconds before blinking and closing it. "Yes, come in…" he said sarcastically, as sarcasm came as an automatic defense for him.

"I—uh, sorry." Darren stuttered when Chris turned to him slowly, the shock of Darren's rushed entrance making him temporarily forget about the near-mental breakdown he had had not five minutes earlier. "I just… I need to talk."

Chris stared at him with wide eyes for a moment before motioning for Darren to sit at the chair by his desk, while he sat himself down on his bed and folded his arms. "Ok," he replied in a small voice, eyebrows high as he felt all the fear of Darren finding out about his feelings for him quickly trickling back. _Just deny it_, Chris reminded himself.

Darren cleared his throat, and Chris realized that the older man looked possibly more nervous than he felt himself. Darren's breath came out shakily and quiet, and Chris had to lean closer to hear every word he said. "I've been thinking through some things…" he began. Chris was sure Darren was going to ask him about Chris' feelings towards him. Chris stayed silent as he watched Darren struggle for the right words, waiting patiently for the dreaded question to come, but it never did.

"Chris, ever since I joined Glee, I've been… _lying_ to you. All of you. About who I really am." Darren looked down at his hands as he twiddled his thumbs in his lap, exhaling slowly and visibly trying not to shake. Chris blinked. _What?_ "I've wanted to tell someone for a long time now, but it never seemed like the right time," Darren continued. "It wasn't just bad timing, though. I felt like… I _still_ feel like… I'm doing something for the world just by holding it in. Like not letting my secret out is actually helping some people and their views… it's complicated."

Now Chris was completely confused. He was sure Darren had figured _him_ out, and was here to call him out about the more-than-friends feelings he'd been having. But Darren wasn't doing that at all! The more he spoke, the less Chris knew what was going on, so he was now listening intently, trying to piece together unknown things in his mind as to figure out what the _hell_ Darren was talking about.

Darren sighed heavily and continued. "The scene that we just shot… That wasn't me being Blaine; that was me. The _real_ me. I just… I didn't really expect what came over me back there, but I also knew that I didn't want it to stop. This thing has been screaming at me in my head for the past few weeks, _months_ even, and I just wanted _so badly_ to let it out… So when the opportunity came, I let it take over. But I've been wanting to tell you about it forever. Chris, I…"

Darren trailed off. Chris' eyes were wide and his jaw went slack as he stared back at Darren, desperately trying to make sense of everything. Was Darren telling him… what he thoughthe was telling him? Was the impossible suddenly becoming a reality? Was Darren telling him that what he thought could never be… could now actually _be_? But Chris didn't have to ask, because the next second, Darren took in a deep, courageous breath and finally let the truth spill out.

"I'm gay."

The words hung there, suspended in the air between them. Chris felt an internal shock at the words, but his expression didn't change, he just stared right on through. It's like when someone shows up at a hospital to see a loved one, and they can already tell by the doctors' piteous expressions that the loved one isn't there anymore, but their minds can't begin to accept it as the truth until the doctors say it out loud. This is what Chris was feeling, that pang of reality that hits you square to the brain or the heart, in his case both.

Darren's expressions held mixed emotions, his eyes swirling with everything from sheer terror to relief. Chris could read the questions written plainly on his face. _This is good, right? It's good that I'm finally being truthful? Oh god, is this bad? Are you mad that I lied for so long? Are you ashamed of me not being who you thought I was? Do you hate me?_

The longer the silence drew on, the more terrified Darren became. His lips were slightly parted, his eyebrows up and innocent-looking, his eyes sparkling and frozen in a scared beg, not unlike a puppy pleading for his master to forgive him. He wanted Chris to say something, that was clear, but say what? Chris nearly choked up at the sight of Darren in front of him, horrified of being rejected by his best friend after spilling his heart out to him.

After an eternity, Chris made his decision. When he spoke, his voice was low and came from deep inside his throat, quiet yet still enough to slice through the silence that hung in the air with two simple words.

"Prove it."


	4. Chapter 4

"Wh-what..?" Darren wasn't sure he heard Chris correctly, taken aback by the mood of the atmosphere completely changing in the blink of an eye.

"Prove it," Chris repeated, his eyes boring into Darren's, challenging him. Darren realized what he meant all too quickly and his mouth hung open in awe, the huskiness of Chris' voice flooding his ears and then Chris was standing up and walking towards him, slowly, never breaking eye contact. He stood over Darren, half a foot away, and looked down at him, his lips parted ever so slightly. His eyes were lust-blown and rimmed with the color of the ocean, and they seemed to repeat the same words over and over again and Darren couldn't get over how in that moment, Chris was waiting for him, expecting him to prove that what he said was true. And oh god, it was.

Everything—every thought or feeling that Darren had tried so hard to ignore and shove to the back of his mind for months—was now flooding back to him under Chris' lustful gaze. He couldn't help it; it was like a gigantic weight had been lifted off his shoulders from the second he told Chris his secret, but he had still been hesitant that Chris would reject him as his friend. Only now, he realized, what Chris wanted was far from ending their friendship: he wanted_ him_. And fuck, Darren wanted Chris too.

Before he could stop himself, Darren leaped out of the desk chair and threw himself at Chris, crashing their lips together. His arms wound tightly around Chris' waist as Chris reached up to tug at Darren's hair, pulling him as close as possible. They kissed each other furiously, both having wanted to do this for far too long but never had they had the chance until now. They both cocked their heads to the side for better access to each other's mouth. Darren sucked Chris' bottom lip into his mouth, causing the younger man to moan and melt in his arms, which nearly sent Darren over the edge right then and there. _God,_ Chris was so hot and perfect against him, sliding his thigh between Darren's legs, which made it Darren's turn to moan out. He was getting hard, _fast_. He grabbed Chris under his thighs and lifted him so Chris' legs wrapped around his waist. Darren held him up by his ass, squeezing hard, as Chris attacked his lips, moving kisses down to his jawline and neck.

Darren moved to the nearest wall and pushed Chris up against it with his body weight. His breathing picked up and he groaned loudly when their hard-ons grinded against each other through the fabric of their jeans. _Wow, this is happening, this is happening now_, Darren thought when his mind regained the ability to even _think_, but it just went fuzzy again as Chris' tongue found its way into his mouth, yet he couldn't bring himself to care. His heart was racing and he could feel Chris' rapid heartbeat against his chest and he _knew_. He knew this was right, this was the one thing he had been holding out on for so long, torturing himself because of his own responsibilities, but in these moments it didn't matter at all, because now Chris was here and his mouth was against his and his pants were getting tight and _oh god stop thinking Darren!_

They broke away for air and Chris held Darren by the shoulders so he wouldn't duck back in for another kiss too soon. "Dare…" He gasped, still struggling for a normal breath, "Darren, I haven't… I've never… done this," he waved his hand between the two of them, and Darren quickly caught on from Chris' flushed cheeks and nervous expression that he wasn't just talking about making out.

"Hey, it's ok," Darren assured him, reaching up to stroke Chris' cheek, and Chris leaned into the touch. He knew very well that Chris was still a virgin, and that if they kept going at the same pace, he wouldn't be for much longer. "I've never done this before either. I mean, not with someone… like you." Chris nodded, visibly understanding that Darren was speaking of genders. Darren smiled shyly, leaning in to press a single kiss to Chris' lips, gentle this time instead of frantic. "But I'm ready for this to happen. I've waited so long to tell someone about my true self, and…" He trailed off, looking deep into Chris' eyes. He needed to understand what Darren was feeling. "Chris, you are the most important person in the world to me. Your friendship means everything to me, and if this does end up becoming more than that, as it looks like it will… I promise, I care about you so much, and I will never hurt you."

A warm smile spread across Chris' lips and he pulled Darren into a slow, sensual kiss that lasted a few seconds before pulling back and saying softly, "I'm ready for this to happen, too. And you are just as important to me as I am to you, and… I want this." He leaned in and spoke barely above a whisper, moving his mouth against Darren's. "I want _you._"

Darren grinned at his words and closed the space between their lips for a more passionate kiss, their tongues dancing as he lifted Chris from against the wall, still carrying him, and laid him gently on the bed, never breaking the kiss. Chris' head dropped onto the pillows and Darren hovered over him, smiling, admiring the way streaks of sunlight from between the window shades cascaded across Chris' beautiful face. Chris' eyes sparkled back up at him and opened his mouth to say something, but Darren swooped down and captured his lips again with his own. This time, the kiss became very passionate and heated and in a matter of minutes, Chris was tugging at the hem of Darren's shirt, and Darren lifted his arms briefly to allow him to pull it off. He then pulled Chris into a sitting position and took off Chris' shirt, admiring the pale skin beneath for just a moment before working on removing the rest of the clothing in their way. Once Darren had pulled Chris's pants and boxers off and Chris had done the same for him, Darren pounced on him again, pushing him back down to the bed. He licked his way down Chris' jawline and began kissing his neck, sucking the skin into his mouth enough to leave a deep red mark on his collarbone so only he would know it was there. Chris bucked his hips up, desperate for some friction, and Darren obliged by pushing his own hips against Chris', making them both moan as their cocks grinded into each other.

"Dare, my—_uh_—stuff is in the drawer in the—_oh, god!—_side table," Chris practically moaned out.

Darren nodded with his lips still planted on Chris' neck, and reached out blindly to the table beside the bed, pulling the drawer open and fishing around for what they needed. Finally, he pulled the lube and box of condoms out and set them on the bed near Chris' head. Darren bit down hard on Chris' shoulder to muffle the groan that came out when he took hold of Darren's dick and began pumping it slowly. Darren quickly lapped across the bite with his tongue, his dick twitching in Chris' hand when he heard Chris whimper beneath him. Finally, he pulled himself off of Chris' neck and stopped the hand that was stroking his dick. "No, let me…" He pressed a quick, heated kiss to the younger boy's lips before moving down the beautiful porcelain body, kissing and sucking down Chris' chest as he went. Chris couldn't stop himself from arching into Darren's touch when he sucked on his hard nipples, swirling his tongue around each of them. He then continued his way down Chris' body until he got his hip bones, kissing each one gently before nuzzling his cheek onto Chris' thigh, taking a second to look back up at him through thick lashes. Chris was watching him, his mouth open in a silent whine, his eyes now completely black with desire. Darren smiled up at him, then lifted his head over Chris' dick and gave the tip a soft kiss. Chris vocalized his moan then, and Darren took that as an invitation as he slowly lowered his mouth over Chris until his nose was buried into soft pubic hair.

This time, Chris cried out and nearly bucked into his mouth but Darren quickly caught him by the hips and held him down. Chris' hands flew to Darren's hair and tugged hard as Darren started bobbing his head, laying his tongue flat against the underside and feeling Chris' pulse through the large vein. Chris couldn't control the sounds he made at this point, and the small trailer was soon filled with his erotic cries. Darren lapped up the pre-come that formed on the tip of Chris' cock and then lifted his head up. Chris whined at the loss of sensation. "Dare, _please_…" He begged, and fuck did he look hot when he begged, but Darren ignored his pleas and moved up Chris' body. He lowered his chest onto Chris' and pushed his tongue into Chris' mouth, forcing him to taste himself and muffling his moan.

Darren pulled back and hovered over Chris, gazing down at him lustfully, a smile playing on his lips. Chris looked up at him with puppy eyes, pleading him again to do _something._ The brunette's dick was pressed firmly against his stomach leaking pre-come, and had Darren not been so terribly horny and in need of being inside Chris he probably would have held off just to watch Chris unravel slowly beneath him. But Darren's dick happened to be in the same condition as Chris', which meant he couldn't wait much longer.

Darren grabbed the lube from beside Chris' head and slicked up his fingers, moving away from Chris to sit between his legs. He lowered his hand and swiped a single finger across the puckered entrance, the cold lube making Chris shiver. Darren began to massage his hole gently, loving the way Chris was muttering and begging and swearing at his touch. Slowly, he pushed at the entrance with the pad of his finger until it broke through the ring of muscle. Chris hissed in pain and shut his eyes tight, his knuckles white as he gripped the sheets. Darren waited patiently for Chris' face to go back to normal, rubbing his thigh soothingly and whispering praises to him all the while. When Chris relaxed a bit, Darren began sliding his finger in and out, marveling at how tight he was. Soon he was able to slip a second lubed finger in, followed by a third. Chris' painful hisses quickly turned into moans of pleasure and he began begging for Darren to go harder, faster,_ more._

As he thrust his fingers in and out of Chris' ass, Darren found Chris to be the sexiest thing he had ever seen. He had his eyes squeezed tight in pure pleasure and the sounds he was making were _to die for._ Darren smiled to himself as he crooked his fingers slightly inside Chris, finding that spot and making the beautiful boy on the bed scream and fuck himself down further onto Darren's fingers. "OH _FUCK_, DARREN! Fuck me _now,_ PLEASE! I'm—oh god, I'm ready!"

Chris' begging and pleading finally worked on Darren, since he had been wanting to fuck him for far too long anyway. Darren pulled his fingers out of Chris and leaned up to swallow the moan that had just began to escape out of Chris' parted lips. He reached to the box of condoms and pulled one out, tearing the wrapper off. Chris helped Darren pull the condom down onto his hard-on, then slick it up with lube.

They were _finally_ ready. Chris lied back onto the pillows and gave Darren the look that said it all: _I'm sure, I want this, I want you. _Darren smiled sweetly down at him, gave him a peck on the lips, and moved to align himself up with Chris' stretched entrance. Slowly, _painfully_ slowly, Darren pushed through the rings of muscle. He stopped immediately when Chris let out a cry of pain, screwing his face up and gripping Darren's shoulders hard. Darren understood how painful this must be for him; after all, this was his first time, and Darren's dick was _much_ bigger than his fingers. Ignoring the unbelievable urge to thrust further into the tight, hot cave of incredible pleasure, he rubbed circles into Chris' sides and did his best to get the younger man to relax to the intrusion.

"Shhh, you're so good, Chris. You're so beautiful, you're doing so good. Take your time baby." Darren cooed into Chris' ear. Chris eventually opened his eyes and Darren felt him relax around his dick. Chris nodded to him, and Darren wasted no time in plunging in further until he was buried deep into Chris, their hips slotted firmly against each other. Chris gasped and moaned out as Darren pulled nearly all the way out and snapped his hips all the way back into him. He picked up the pace, thrusting gently at first into Chris, slowly letting himself fuck Chris harder and harder. Chris gripped Darren's hair and pulled him into a fierce make-out session, both groaning and crying out into each other's mouths.

After a few more thrusts, Darren pulled completely out of Chris' ass, making Chris whine loudly at the loss. But before Chris could beg for him to keep going, Darren flipped Chris over onto his stomach, spread his ass cheeks apart with both hands, and thrust in deeply. Chris' cry was muffled by the pillow, and Darren continued fucking him hard and fast. He leaned forward so he was lying on top of Chris, placing his hands over Chris' and entwining their fingers together, and when he thrust back in, the angle was perfect and he hit Chris' prostate full on. "_OH FUCK, DARREN!_" Chris screamed, his head turned to the side so one cheek was pressed into the pillows. "Keep going, _don't fucking ever stop!_"

Darren leaned down and captured Chris' mouth with his. "Never, Chris, I'll never stop, baby, I promise," he whispered huskily against Chris' lips. The brunette was now moaning with every exhale and Darren kissed the back of his neck and shoulders, leaving dark marks scattered everywhere on the pale skin. He let go of one of Chris' hands and used his free hand to grab Chris' dick, which was pressed firmly between his stomach and the sheets. Chris groaned loudly as Darren stroked his dick with the same rhythm of his hips, which were now slapping hard into Chris' ass with a speed not normally used on virgins. But Chris took it, _loved _it, and Darren could tell just how much he loved getting fucked when the dick in his hands began shooting white liquid all over the sheets. Chris screamed with pleasure and his ass tightened impossibly hard around Darren's cock, and soon Darren's moans followed Chris' as they both reached orgasm and everything went white. When he finally came to, Chris' dick had begun to soften in Darren's hands and he finished pumping himself into Chris, slowing down as the last of his cum came spilling out.

Ever so gently, he eased out of Chris, hissing at how oversensitive he was, and collapsed next to the worn-out figure of his best-friend-turned-lover. _Holy FUCK_, Darren thought, because that was no doubt the greatest orgasm he'd ever had. Chest still heaving and heart beat still racing, Darren turned his head lazily to Chris, who was smiled blissfully back at him, and Darren's heart swelled at how beautiful Chris looked basking in the afterglow. He reached across and stroked Chris' cheek, pushing the hair out of his eyes. "Dare…" Chris whispered, deep blue eyes locked with Darren's gold ones. "That… that was _incredible."_

Darren leaned across and kissed Chris sweetly on the lips before pulling back and grinning at him, his eyes full of warmth, making Chris feel protected and wanted and loved, like he and Darren were the only two people in the world. "Yeah. Yeah, it was."

Once he regained his strength, Darren grabbed his T-shirt and used it to clean Chris off from his own come. He tossed the shirt back onto the floor and snuggled up close to Chris, who was still lying on his stomach, gazing softly at Darren through heavy-lidded eyes. Darren's arms wrapped around Chris' waist, engulfing him in his warmth and safety, and Chris nuzzled his head against Darren's chest. They fell asleep like that, tangled in each other's arms, happy and relaxed and blissful, still completely and innocently unaware of the brewing disaster they had just created.


	5. Chapter 5

When Chris woke up in his bed Sunday morning, he groaned lazily and didn't want to move. Everything was so soft and cozy and warm. The covers were pulled up past his shoulders, he was wearing his favorite fuzzy pajama pants, the arm around him was nice and comforting, and… Wait. What?

He turned his head groggily over his shoulder, blinking through sleep-bleary eyesight, and caught sight of Darren's peaceful face half-buried into the pillows behind Chris, his knees bent into the backs of his own and one arm wrapped around his waist. _Oh._ Chris turned back so he was facing forward again, eyes wide as the events of the previous night came back to him in an instant.

_He met me in my trailer_, Chris remembered. _He said he needed to talk. He came out to me. We admitted to having feelings for each other. We had sex. We fell asleep in my trailer. Darren woke me up a few hours later and took me home. And now…_ He sneaked another look at Darren over his shoulder. His mouth had parted slightly and he'd started drooling a little. Chris smiled warmly at the man asleep next to him, realizing what his feelings for him meant. _Now, I think I'm falling for my best friend._

Chris would have loved nothing more than to fall back asleep in Darren's arms and cuddle with him for the rest of the day, but his alarm clock had other ideas.

'_BBBRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNN NNNNNNNNNNGGGGGGGGGGGG!'_

Darren groaned annoyingly behind him as Chris winced at the loud alarm and reached over to turn it off. When he settled back into the bed, Darren was sitting up and rubbing at his eyes. "Son of a _bitch_, that's loud," he muttered groggily, but when he turned to Chris his features softened and a big, dopey smile replaced the annoyed snarl. "Good morning," he said sweetly, and Chris' heart skipped a beat at the sound of Darren's adorably sleep-raspy voice. He smiled back at him.

"Morning, baby. Thank you for bringing me home earlier. Last night was _amazing_." As soon as he said it, recognition hit hard onto Darren's face, as if all the memories of the previous night had flooded back to him just as they had to Chris. But instead of the look of immediate warmth and happiness, Chris watched as Darren's smile vanished and his expression changed from realization to shock and then, before he could hide the look, to regret. Chris' own smile faded as he suddenly became worried, like the night before _shouldn't_ have happened, or at least in Darren's eyes. "Last night… _was_ amazing… right?" He asked.

Darren saw the scared look on Chris' face and said quickly, "Er—yeah, of course! Yes, I suppose it was." _Suppose?_ It was as if he was trying not to hurt Chris' feelings, but it was too late. _Didn't he go through the exact same things with me last night? _Chris wondered frantically. _Didn't it mean anything to him? Wasn't our first time together, or first time in that way at all, as important to him as it was for me?_

"Darren, was last night for you… a mistake?" Chris asked slowly, although inside his brain he was freaking out. He'd given his virginity to Darren, thinking they were on the same page about feelings after all they had admitted to each other, but then why did he now seem unsure? Did Chris give a part of himself to someone who didn't feel the same way after all? Was Darren even serious about being gay in the first place?

Darren studied Chris for a moment or two, seeing all the worry and anxiety of being used or rejected plain on his face. "Chris, _no._ It wasn't a mistake, you're right, it _was_ amazing, and nothing I said last night was a lie. It's just…" He broke away from Chris' eye contact to stare at the dark blue covers that were now bunched up messily on the bed. After a minute of what seemed to be trying to find the right words, Darren spoke again. "Chris, I'm not unhappy about what we did. I'm glad it was you I came out to, and I'm so relieved that we told each other about the feelings we'd been having… But I'm also seeing the downside to all this. As much as I would love to scoop you up and take you for myself, you have to realize that I can't be the perfect boyfriend for you, or even a _normal_ boyfriend, if one at all. I have… this career that I've got is a lot more complicated than even I was aware of when I first started. I can't just waltz around now telling everyone that this is me and always has been. I can't expect the world to see me like that and not start pointing fingers at innocent people and spread rumors about me."

Confusion and hurt was spreading across Chris' face now, and Darren quickly tried to explain again. "It's not you, Chris—I know, that's such a cliché, but trust me, _it's not you._ And it's not about being gay… Well, it is, but not in the way that you think. It's just… I'm not ashamed, Chris. It's too hard to explain, but just know that I'm not ashamed of being gay. It's the media I'm concerned about, really…"

Chris nodded slowly at Darren, trying to piece everything he'd just said together. "So… you're ok with being gay, you weren't lying about having those feelings for me… but you can't commit to being with me or even come out as gay because it could wreck your image." Chris' lips formed a tight sarcastic line as he nodded at his own words, steadily becoming pissed off at what Darren was saying. He was basically telling him that although he knew 'gay was ok', he was still afraid of the media. He was more concerned about his career and how the world viewed him than he was about his true self, and about Chris.

He knew Darren could sense the resentment in his words, but he didn't care; how could someone be so selfish?

"Chris, it isn't like that. This isn't about me—"

"Of _course_ it's about you!" Chris' voice rose. He felt hurt, betrayed, used. Darren didn't care about him, all he cared about was his _'image'_. "You're not ashamed of being gay, but you _are _ashamed of what critics think of you. You don't want to be known as 'That other gay guy from Glee'. You don't want to be seen hand in hand with me by paparazzi, because what if someone big and important sees you like that? You want to be that cool straight guy that's 'deep and caring and _so_ inspirational' because you hang out with LGBT people like it's nothing. You love the attention you get when people come up to you and say that you're so amazing because you're such a good person and you're so accepting for a straight guy. You love it when teenage girls scream at the sight of you, love the way you seem so _masucline_ and _perfect_ and _desirable_ to everyone, and you especially love it when the world looks at you and goes, 'Gee, I wish I weremore like_ Darren Freaking Criss_!'"

Chris jumped off the bed and stormed out of the room and into the kitchen, trying to ignore Darren's pleas.

"Chris, this really isn't about me or me being gay or me being with you, not at all! I'm _helping_ the LGBT community by not revealing my true self," Darren explained.

Chris actually _snorted_ at Darren's words. "_Help?!_ You honestly think you're helping LGBT people by _hiding_ the fact that you're one of them?" He bit back the words _idiotic lunatic,_ because he figured it probably wouldn't help the situation.

"Yes!" Darren insisted. Chris just shook his head. _Unbelievable,_ he thought. Darren sighed in exasperation and tried again.

"You know how the world views gay men. You know how _straight_ men view gay men. They stay away from them, try not to hang out or even stand near them, like they know society is watching and if they even _talk_ to a gay man, they're automatically gay." Chris' face turned serious at his words. These were things he'd known too well for all his life. Darren continued, "It simply isn't socially acceptable to be friends or have any type of relationship with a gay man when you're a straight man. Even straight guys that claim to support the LGBT community keep their distance. I'm sure you're also very aware that nearly half the population believes that being gay is a choice, or can be influenced onto someone. Tons of people think that you can 'become' gay if you hang around gays or watch them on television—" he looked straight into Chris' eyes—"or if you work closely with them. If you touch them, hug them, kiss them."

Chris swallowed as he processed this information. "Yes, Darren. I'm painfully aware of what people _say._ That doesn't mean it's true."

"I know, I know it's not true," Darren assured him quickly. "But what if someone could change those views? What if the world saw someone that was straight, but didn't care about what people think of gays? Someone that could prove to the world that you can't _chose_ to be gay because you want to and it's 'in', or _become _gay because you hang out with people from the LGBT community, or _catch the gay_ because you've touched or kissed or done _something_ with someone that is gay. Wouldn't that be great? Wouldn't it be nice to show people that gay guys and straight guys can be friends without society going nuts about it? Wouldn't it be _amazing_ if someone could show the world that being gay doesn't make you different from straight people or make you a freak, it just makes you who you are?" Darren paused for a second to let that sink in.

"Chris, _I_ want to be that person. _I _want to show straight dickheads that they don't have to run away like a rape victim when they see a gay man. _I_ want people to see that things can't influence you to be gay, just because of the environment you work in or the people you hang out with and care about. I want to prove that if you're gay, you were _always_ gay. I want _equality!_ And how can I do that if I come out now? How do you think the world will react if they see in all the headlines that the straight guy on Glee—the one who is comfortable with his straight sexuality and tries to make people realize that they are being ridiculous with how they treat the LGBT community—is _gay_? Imagine the rumors that would spread like a wildfire across the nation. They'd say I chose this. They'd say Glee changed me. They'd say _you_ changed me. Everything that I'd been working toward fixing, everything about changing peoples' minds about LGBT people and actually influencing society towards equality, would crash and burn on the spot. _That's_ why I can't be honest. _That's_ why I can't tell the world who I really am, and that's why I can't just walk outside happily holding your hand or take you out to a nice date or even _tell_ anyone that we're together. It would ruin everything I'd worked towards, and I care too much about the LGBT community to screw that up. I'm doing this for the good of society, for the good of equality, and if I have to sacrifice my true self and my love life and _everything_ personal to me, then so be it.

"Chris, I know I can't expect you to be on board with this. It's near impossible to understand, but I'm not changing my mind anytime soon. You deserve so much better than a man who is willing to keep his life a secret. You deserve someone who you _can_ go on a nice date with in public, someone who will kiss you and love you and be there for you whenever and _wherever_ you are, in front of whomever that sees. I'm not going to lie, I can't do that for you. Last night, I spilled my heart out to you and I don't regret that. You deserved to know how I feel about you, and I don't think those feelings will ever go away, but I want you to be happy, and if I'm not the person that can give you that happiness, then I won't blame you if you walked away now."

Chris stared, open-mouthed at Darren, who'd pretty much just told him all his deepest secrets and desires within the past five minutes. He couldn't believe it. He'd never given a thought to the things Darren talked about—how society acted towards gays in general, how many people out there still frown upon being gay because they think it's a choice, and how a role model like Darren could help put a large drop in the bucket towards true equality. In that moment, he realized, he'd never loved Darren more. This was a man willing to sacrifice everything he was for the LGBT community, a community of people that didn't even know Darren was one of them.

Finally, Chris moved from where he was standing in the middle of his kitchen and engulfed Darren in the tightest hug he could give. Darren actually laughed in relief, and hugged him back. Chris pulled back a few moments later to look into Darren's eyes. "You are the most incredible, noble, and insane motherfucker I've ever met, and you're crazy if you think I'm giving up on you because of that." He cupped Darren's face in his hands, rough with adorable morning scruff, and kissed him full on the lips. Darren smiled into the kiss and held him close. When they broke apart for air, Darren's eyes were shiny and he gave Chris the warmest, happiest look he had ever seen.

"I love you, Chris Colfer."

"I love you, too."


	6. Chapter 6

"HAVE YOU GUYS SEEN THIS!?" Lea screeched as the stormed with Dianna at her heels up to Chris and Darren, who were chatting as casually as possible from their actors' chairs. Both boys jumped a little at Lea's abruptness when she came up and shoved her iPad in their faces. It was loading a video from YouTube. "Look! This bitch went on HLN earlier this year and talked all this shit about your guys' kiss! I didn't even know this happened until Dianna showed me—"

"A fan sent it to me!" Dianna explained. "I guess they wanted to show us how critical and hateful people can get, and to expect the worse for when the episode airs tonight…" She trailed off as she and Lea tried to get the video to work.

Darren looked at Chris and their wide eyes met. It was November 8, 2011, and 'The First Time' would be airing at 9 that night. Darren already knew well what to expect from the fans: thousands of Twitter and Tumblr posts throughout the night about how much it was '_about time'_ and '_every minute was perfect'_ and '_I love Klaine/hate Finchel soooo much!_' but he was also VERY much aware of how the haters would treat them. He knew that the _'disgusting'_ comments and the _'I hate gays' _messages and even the personal _'go die in a hole'_ hate-mail he would get would all eventually die down after a few days, but he still felt heartbroken at the hatred that spread around just because of one liberal television show, and he knew Chris looked forward to it even less than he did. He was, after all, the real-life gay one—that is, the one people actually knew about.

Chris' gaze back into Darren's eyes was a mixture of sadness and the look that said '_Oh, well. What can you do?'_ Dianna and Lea finally got the video buffered ("This place has _awful_ Wi-Fi") and then Chris and Darren were peering over the iPad to watch the clip from HLN.

"_Glee Kiss Outrage!" _The newswoman said to the camera. _"There's a brand-new debate…"_

Both boys watched as the news anchors explained the situation about their kiss that aired back in Season 2. The woman then introduced Victoria Jackson, a conservative SNL alumnus who hate-blogged about the kiss, and the scene changed to a plump blonde woman, grinning as her own words were repeated by the news anchors in her brief description. The newswoman then asked her how she felt about the accusations that she was homophobic.

"_Well, um… It doesn't matter what I think," _Victoria Jackson replied, and Darren winced at how annoyingly nasally her voice was._ "What matters is what the bible says—" _she held up a copy of the bible in one hand,_ "—and I'm really concerned about our country… Secular humanism is ruling the airwaves, and it's stealing the innocence away from this whole generation of children. My daughter's a teenager, and I can't find any show that she can watch!"_

The newswoman then tried showing her a response to the blog post, which explained that there were gay and lesbian kids in the world who found it difficult to express themselves. _"So, Victoria, do you understand the other side of the argument?" _the woman reasoned. _"Some are saying the show could actually be helping kids."_

Jackson sighed in a sarcastic little huff. _"Huh! No, it's not helping them… They should have a celibacy campaign, and tell kids that 50% of teenagers now have this new STD from oral sex! That's what they should be, y'know, doing, instead of trying to make kids gay… I just want to know why the liberals are pro-Muslim AND pro-gay; Muslims kill gays—"_

"OH MY GOD SHUT IT OFF!" Chris demanded and started tapping the screen furiously until Victoria Jackson's uneducated rant was stilled. Lea quickly took the iPad away from him before he actually caused damage to it.

"Look, guys, I'm really sorry but I have to go to the recording studio," she said. "Dianna and I just thought you should see that even though there are tons of haters and critics out there that will bash you for what is airing tonight, most of them aren't even as smart as this woman, who clearly set a very low bar. I'll see you guys later; call me if you need me!" Lea and Dianna walked away, leaving Chris and Darren alone again, both jaws resting in their laps.

After a few minutes of silence, enough to let the content of the video sink in, Darren turned toward Chris. "Let's just… not talk about that right now," he begged. "We can discuss it later, but I really just can't think about the mess the world is in right now." Chris nodded in agreement.

It had been about a month since they had shot the 'The First Time' episode, a month since they had confessed their feelings for each other, gone all the way together, and finally traded 'I love you's. Like Chris had said the morning after they had sex, he understood what Darren was trying to do and why they couldn't be seen out in public. And while Darren was forever grateful for Chris' acceptance to the matter, he still felt horribly guilty. He knew Chris deserved nothing less than the perfect boyfriend who would go out on dates with him wherever they were and shamelessly discuss their love for each other to anyone who would listen. Darren couldn't do that. He couldn't just kiss Chris spontaneously if he wanted to. So they weren't exactly boyfriends, but they weren't just friends either. Darren didn't need a label on it to know who he was in love with, but for Chris' sake, he called him and Chris lovers. But as happy as they were together, they couldn't tell the rest of the cast about it, because if more than just the two of them knew, there would definitely be trouble. These days, no one's lips were sealed.

Chris gave Darren a tiny smile. "They can't touch us, Darren. All of those haters… they can't do anything to make our jobs less meaningful or important. We know what we're doing, we know what's right. That's what matters. You know that, right?"

Darren met Chris' eyes, his own sparkling now. "Yeah, I guess I do. It's still horrible, though. People like that Jackson woman… I mean, she didn't even know what she was talking about the entire time, and all her facts were wrong… But if you put a roomful of people like her in charge of something, the world pretty much crashes and burns right there. It doesn't matter if they are right or wrong; what matters is that they are strong in numbers. I mean, come on… _why_ can't idiots just stop reproducing?"

Chris laughed out loud. "I love you so much, Darren!" He said quietly, so that only his lover could hear.

"I love you too, baby," Darren replied. He then got an idea and gave Chris a seductive smile. Even though he couldn't be the perfect boyfriend in public, they could still rock each other's worlds in private. "We should, you know… go home early. I'm so tired, and I kind of just want to… _go to bed._" He said the last part by whispering in Chris' ear low in his throat, somewhere between a purr and a growl, while he stroked one finger along Chris' thigh. Chris squirmed in his chair and heaved in a shaky breath.

"Yes. We should, I'm SO tired."

"I'll meet you at my place in fifteen." Darren's finger teased the area between his thighs, and his breath tickled the outside of his ear. "Love you, sexy." And with that, Darren removed his hand and strutted away towards the parking lot, leaving Chris still in his actor's chair, jaw now resting on his hardening bulge.

Fifteen minutes later, a loud knock echoed off Darren's front door and the second he came and opened it, Chris darted inside and pounced on him, shoving him up against the wall. Their mouths slid together and Chris' tongue forced its way into Darren's mouth. Darren moaned and tugged him closer by the waist, parting their mouths to kiss down the younger man's jawline. He sucked some of the pale, beautiful skin on the neck into his mouth, making Chris whimper. "Come on, bedroom," Chris growled in Darren's ear, tugging him towards the stairs. They stumbled up the steps, never breaking the kiss, all the while slowly losing all articles of clothing.

Chris swung the door open and pushed Darren down onto the bed so his legs draped over the side, then positioned himself between his legs. "Baby, I want to try something that I've been working on for a while…" Chris motioned towards Darren's dick, and it didn't take long for him to get the idea. Both of them knew Chris was less experienced in sexual activity than Darren was, which was why the older man took the lead the first time they did it. So far, Darren was the only one to top, as well as suck Chris' dick just because he knew more about blow jobs than Chris did, too. But now, Chris had a certain gleam in his eyes, which were a darker shade than normal as he looked Darren up and down. Darren swallowed loudly at the sheer lust in Chris' voice as he spoke to him.

"So, you've been… practicing? By yourself?" Chris nodded with a knowing smile, and Darren's already-hard cock twitched on his belly at the pure sexiness that Chris Colfer was. Images of him practicing alone in his home, with no one to hear him cry out in pleasure, flew past Darren's mind and it was the hottest thing ever. "Ok," he said finally. "Let's see what you've got, babe."

Chris leaned up from his spot on the floor to peck Darren on the lips before sitting back between his legs. Darren propped himself up on his elbows so he could get the full view of what Chris was about to do. The brunette smiled warmly up at him, rubbing his thighs affectionately before leaning down to kiss them, trailing his lips from the inner thigh near the knee up to the base of his cock. Chris continued kissing down the other leg, making Darren squirm above him, needing more. He smiled and patted Darren's leg gently before moving back up to the base of his cock. Very slowly, Chris licked a stripe up the underside to the very tip, then rubbed his mouth across the slit, pre-come coating his pink lips. Darren let out a groan and resisted the urge to close his eyes and rest his head back on the bed, because he wanted desperately to see this.

Chris lowered his head a little and mouth Darren's balls gently, enough to tease but not enough for pleasure. After a few moments of this and Darren actually verbalizing his pleas, Chris finally took pity on him and raised his head over Darren's dick. He kissed the tip, and then slowly sank his _entire fucking mouth and throat_ over it until his lips were stretched around the very base. Chris looked up at Darren through a canopy of eyelashes, and that was when Darren practically lost it. This man had never looked more beautiful or sexy or _unf_, no words could describe it, his pretty mouth wrapped perfectly around Darren's cock, and Darren could feel the tip pushing up against the back of Chris' throat. Chris already had his hands planted firmly on Darren's hips, so when he cried out and tried to thrust deeper, he was thankfully stopped.

After Darren quit squirming and finally made an effort to calm down, Chris took a deep, slow breath through his nose, held Darren's hips down more firmly, and _swallowed_. "OH FUCK!" Darren screamed, and he couldn't help but shut his eyes closed. He was nearly sent over the edge at just the feel of Chris' throat tighten and pulsate and message around his dick all at once. "Jesus, Chris, you're so perfect," he groaned out. Chris hummed in approval, which made Darren buck upwards again. This time, Chris didn't have as good of a hold on Darren's hips, so Darren really did send himself deeper into his throat, causing the younger man to make a strangled sound and pull back.

"Oh, shit, baby I'm so sorry!" Darren apologized as Chris coughed a little. He patted Chris on the back a little before taking his face in his hands. "Are you ok? We can stop if you—"

"No, Darren I'm fine, I promise. It's ok, I want to keep doing this. This is about you, I want to pleasure you as much as I can tonight. Don't worry about me, you won't hurt me." Chris took Darren's hands in his and pulled them from his face, then pushed Darren onto his back again so he could resume sucking him.

"Ok, if you're sure. I just really don't want to hurt y—_OHMYGODYES!" _Darren moaned, his eyes rolling back up into his head as Chris sunk all the way back down onto his dick without warning. This time, instead of swallowing, Chris began to bob his head up and down, his throat tightening more and more around Darren's cock as he went. When Darren opened his eyes and looked down, Chris gave him a look that repeated those same words, _This is about you. I want to pleasure you._ Darren's head flopped back onto the bead as a howl escaped his lips; Chris had pulled his mouth halfway up his dick and used his hand to pump on the bottom half, twisting his wrist with every stroke. Darren's hands flew to Chris' hair from where they were strangling the sheets beneath them and tugged, letting Chris know how close he was.

In a split second, the warmth and wetness and pleasure surrounding his dick disappeared and Chris stood up. He pulled Darren up the bed so his head rested on the pillows, and then swung his legs so he straddled Darren's hips. The man on the bottom was still breathing hard from the incredible blow job, but now just stared at Chris in confusion. Chris pulled open Darren's drawer on the nightstand next to his bed and pulled out a bottle of lube, which he used to slick up Darren's dick. Seeing the confusion in his eyes, Chris smiled warmly at Darren beneath him and explained, "I prepped myself before I got here." Before another wave of images of Chris alone in his bedroom doing _godknowswhat_ to himself, Chris sat up on his knees above Darren's dick and in one quick motion, fucked himself down on top of it. Chris threw his head back and moaned above him, bare chest and neck already glistening with sweat from the heat in the room. Darren grabbed his hips and held Chris there on top of him so he would give himself enough time to relax around Darren's cock after such an abrupt intrusion. "God, I love you so fucking much Chris," he told him, still shocked at the fact that Chris was riding him.

Finally, Chris was ready to move and he lifted his hips so only the very tip of Darren's dick was inside him, then quickly sat back down, filling himself back up with pulsating cock. "Ugh, Darren you feel so good inside me," he cried out. Darren helped lift his hips up again and with every time Chris sank back down, he thrust his hips up so his thighs met Chris' ass with a slap. Chris leaned down and captured Darren's mouth with his, their tongues dancing together, which made Darren's cock brush up into Chris' prostate perfectly with every thrust. "Oh, god, Darren I love you!" Chris growled into Darren's mouth.

Darren's tongue massaged Chris' in his mouth as he began thrusting upwards with a much greater force. His hands were now squeezing hard on that perfect, round ass that bobbed up and down above him. Chris was crying out and finally had to pull away from Darren's mouth so he could catch his breath, head resting between Darren's neck and shoulder as he sucked in his scent through his nose. "Shit, Chris I'm so close," Darren told him.

"Me, too baby," Chris whimpered against his skin. Darren held onto him tightly, wrapping his arms around Chris' lower back as he pulled and pushed him up and down through every thrust. Pretty soon, Chris bit down on Darren's shoulder to muffle his cry as he shot white stripes onto both their stomachs, as the friction from his cock being between them was enough to set him off. Darren shouted Chris' name as his ass tightened around his dick, causing incredible friction and sending him over the edge right after Chris. The younger man didn't stop bobbing his ass up and down on Darren's cock to ride them both through their orgasms, and finally collapsed on top of Darren when it all stopped.

Chris smiled down at Darren and pushed his curls out of his eyes. "Did you like that, baby?"

"_Like_ it?" Darren laughed, chest still rising and falling rapidly. "I fucking _loved _it. You should have seen yourself, Chris; you're the most beautiful man I've seen in my whole fucking life. Holy shit, that was hot."

Chris grinned. "Glad you enjoyed it. You deserved this, Darren. After everything you do every day of your life… No one deserves as much pleasure as you."

The humorous look in Darren's eyes faded as he gazed up at the love of his life. "You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, Chris."

Chris smiled, then pushed himself off of Darren to clean up the mess. They changed the sheets and rid themselves of dried come before finally falling back into bed. Darren snuggled up behind Chris and pulled him close to his chest, breathing in his scent. He really did love this man more than anything in the world. He especially loved the way that in moments like these, when he and Chris were so close nothing could come between them, he forgot all about the outside world and the critics and the hatred that existed out there. Darren smiled into Chris' shoulder, loving the way that he could forget about everything else and just live in the moment with Chris. It made him feel as though they could run off together and no one would know, they could be together and everything would be alright. Darren dreamed that night of the perfect life they could live, one that only existed in the fantasy of a desperate lover.


	7. Chapter 7

Chris woke up the next morning before Darren did and decided to make use of the morning by cooking a nice breakfast. He quietly unwrapped himself from Darren's possessive snuggle and tip-toed out of the bedroom towards the kitchen. _Pancakes,_ he thought. _Darren loves pancakes._ He figured waking up to the smell of cooking pancakes would be better than waking up to the inevitable hate-comments online about the previous night's episode.

Wearing only his boxers, Chris found all the ingredients for pancakes and began heating the stove. He sung some Katy Perry song mindlessly as he cooked, careful not to be loud enough to wake Darren up. It was only 5:30, but they had to be on set in two and a half hours, and Chris knew very well that Darren's sleeping habits were anything but healthy, so he would let him sleep for as long as possible.

Just as he was pouring the last of the batter onto the pan on the stove, he heard the rustling of sheets from the bedroom and the shuffling of socked feet. Darren appeared in the doorway with a sleepy grin on his face before moving behind Chris and wrapping his arms around him. "Good morning, sleepyhead," Chris said to him, smiling.

"Mmmh, 'morning," Darren grumbled sleepily in his ear, chin resting on his shoulder. He watched as Chris finished the last pancake and turned off the stove. "You really went all out this morning. You didn't have to."

"Nonsense, I woke up early and thought it would be a waste if I didn't cook something special. Besides, I kinda want to eat these pancakes in bed with you while we watch last night's episode."

Darren stiffened behind him before pulling away, as if he'd forgotten about the episode and was just now waking up from a perfect-world dream. "Oh, right… That."

Chris turned to face him. "C'mon, Dare, it won't be that bad. We worked hard on that episode, and it was very special for us. We won't even look at the news or comments about it. We're ignoring the haters, remember?"

"I know, I know," Darren said, looking down at his feet. "It's just… Every time I think about it, I remember that horrible bitch on HLN… Who was she, Viola Johnson?"

"Victoria Jackson," Chris corrected.

"Right, her. I just can't get what she said out of my head. '_Sickening.' 'Stealing the innocence from children.' 'Trying to make kids gay.' _It doesn't matter that she's stupid and wrong, because too many people will listen and agree with someone like her. All those haters bashing us for what we are doing, all the horrible comments, the death threats… It makes me sick, Chris. It reminds me of why I'm keeping my secret, why I'm doing what I'm doing. The ignorance and prejudice in this world makes me downright sick."

"'Ignorance and prejudice', huh?" Chris winked. "Better watch out for character bleed, Mr. Anderson." Darren let out an annoyed huff, but smiled as he did. Chris sighed gently and got serious. "Look, Darren, all of this makes me sick, too. But you of all people know how important it is that we go through with these things. The critics aren't what matter; it's the kids that benefit from what we do. They are who matter."

Sighing, Darren nodded. "You're right," he said. He then grabbed two plates from a kitchen cabinet and handed one to Chris. "Now let's get our pancakes and go watch Klaine sex in bed." Chris laughed and followed his lead, taking a small stack of pancakes onto his plate and drowning them in syrup.

A few minutes later, they were both snuggled up back under the covers with Darren's laptop sitting between them. Before the 'sex' scene even came, Chris was flooded with relief to see that the entire episode had been handled in the best way possible. Each Kurt and Blaine scene was way more mature and well-scripted than Chris had remembered from shooting them, which he was extremely thankful for. He wasn't in the least bit surprised when he noticed they had cut out the intense make-out session between him and Darren on the bed; _that_ would have been iffy.

When the Klaine love scene showed up on the screen, Chris glanced over at Darren and saw that he was not nearly as nervous or upset about it as he had been earlier. It was like the world and its critics and hatred just disappeared in the face of the love Kurt and Blaine shared. Chris could feel it, too, when he watched their characters lying on that bed and looking into each other's eyes, like they were the only two people on the planet. He smiled to himself, remembering that they had barely been acting in that scene. Even though he and Darren were good actors, they were not good enough to fake that look of pure love.

Finally, the ending credits invaded the laptop screen and Darren reached over to shut it off. "C'mon, baby. We've got to get to work in half an hour."

"Yeah…" Chris agreed, smiling warmly at Darren. "And we both desperately need to shower, but I think today we should be eco-friendly and only take one."

Darren grinned back at him in agreement and kissed him sweetly on the lips before scooping him into his arms and carrying him towards the bathroom.

The day at work was surprisingly normal, given that the "Glee Sex Episode" had just aired the night before and Chris had been expecting an uncomfortable tension to hang between conversations, since he figured everyone would try awkwardly not to talk about the episode. However, when he got there (fifteen minutes later than Darren, just to be safe from suspicions), Ryan greeted him cheerily and lead him to the choir room set, where the rest of the cast were playing around goofily and acting like the total idiots they always were. Chris was thankful for this, because as much as he loved the episode, he didn't want to talk about anything closely related to him and Darren being together, much less having sex.

Luckily Darren, being the great actor he was (since he kind of had to be, literally all the time), regarded Chris like he always did as the casual friend that he had been to him before shooting "The First Time". Chris always played along, and even though he knew Darren was used to covering up the truth in front of all their friends, Chris hated it. He wanted nothing more than to go over to the female casts' little gossip circle and rant to Lea, Dianna, Jenna, Naya, Heather, and Amber about how incredible it is to be "Darren Criss' Sort-Of-Boyfriend". But he couldn't, and he knew that perfectly well. So, he acted like the good boy he was and sat in Kurt's choir room chair for the episode and kept his mouth shut.

Finally, day became night and the cast and crew were released from shooting at around 2 in the morning. After a long day of work, everyone was exhausted and ready to go home. Even Darren gave Chris a look that said "Sorry, babe, can't bone you tonight, I'm beat" and made Chris snort. They were all walking to the parking lot towards their cars when saw Lea rush up to Darren in front of him.

"Hey, Darren, are you excited about the Emmys next week? I'm soooo excited it's going to be a blast! I already have my dress picked out and my shoes and my hair…"

_Good god,_ Chris thought, still watching Lea ramble off excitedly to Darren from a few paces back. _Even with no energy left, how is Lea always so energetic!? Girls…_

"Oh, yeah, I'm really excited," Darren said tiredly. He was starting to gain dark circles under his eyes, which worried Chris, and he suddenly wished Lea would just leave him alone so he could go home and get at least a semi-full night of sleep. He refrained himself from saying anything, though, and continued eavesdropping, if it could be called that since Darren seemed fully aware of Chris watching him.

Chris tuned back in to his friends' conversation.

"You don't seem so excited! Gosh, Darren, have you picked out a suit yet? Cory was telling me that he heard that the fashion magazines will be watching the menswear extra close this year. Although, I think that might just be him trying to convince me not to go crazy with my outfit. Oh, yeah, and who are you going with as a date?" Lea asked.

Chris' eyes widened and he could Darren was taken aback too, as he saw him visibly stop in his tracks for a moment, only to quickly start walking again to make up for it. Chris could feel his heart beat a little harder inside his chest. They hadn't talked about the Emmys, mainly because neither one of them wanted to think about having to go separately. Sure, they had been to a few other events alone since they got together, but this was the _Emmys._ This was big, and each year nearly every celebrity couple in Hollywood took it as an excuse to flaunt their PDA.

"Uh…" Darren seemed stumped for a minute, but he finally shook his head as if to blame it on his own sleepiness. "Mia. I'm taking Mia, of course." He nodded, like he was trying to convince himself of what he'd just said.

Chris felt a pang in his heart as he watched Lea blab some more before finally prancing toward own car. Darren got to his own car and just as he reached out to the door handle, he looked up and caught Chris' eye, only for a moment. Chris couldn't hide his disappointed expression quick enough, and as a result saw Darren's plea for forgiveness in his eyes, saying he was sorry for everything, not just his date to the Emmys but also all the hiding.

Chris didn't want that. He didn't want Darren to feel guilty at all about what he was doing; they both knew he had to do it. So, Chris put on his best fake smile and shook his head a little, telling Darren not to worry about it. He finally got to his car at the end of the lot and mentally face-palmed himself as he sat down for letting Darren see that he was disappointed. It was selfish of him, really, and he wouldn't allow himself to make Darren worry any more than he already was. That was just cruel.

The drive home sped by and before he could even comprehend what was happening, Chris was flopping facedown into his warm bed, ready to fall asleep. Except he couldn't. He lay there, staring at the ceiling for hours, trying to get his mind to stop racing. He had so many things he knew he needed to do. He still had to find a date to the Emmys, needed to rent a decent, fashionable suit, and needed to talk with his publicist about how he should act towards questions about the latest Glee episode. Chris was slowly able to organize his thoughts and ignore them for the most part, except for one thing that kept on bugging him.

Chris would have to watch Darren and Mia at the Emmys; Mia in his arms, Mia in his photo ops, Mia on his lips. He knew he would sit through that entire event not caring about who was best dressed, who got nominated, or who won. He would float through the awards show with a fake smile plastered on his face, a fake date on his arm, and a fake story to tell the press of how he and Darren weren't nervous about the love scene because they were such good friends. _Only_ friends.

Before he knew it, Chris was drifting off to sleep, temporarily forgetting the rut he was in, and the tears in his eyes and on his cheeks were left for the night to dry.


	8. Chapter 8

"Ok, I'm ready," Mia called from Darren's bathroom before emerging out into the living room. Darren turned to see his fake girlfriend in a stunning black dress that hugged her in all the right places. Even though he knew he was gay, Darren couldn't deny Mia's beauty as she walked towards him. It was a good thing, truthfully, since he had to pretend to be thoroughly attracted to her all night. He smiled at her as she looked him up and down in his polished suit.

"You look great, Mia," he said genuinely, still grateful that even though she didn't know about his secret, she was still willing to play pretend with him. He and Mia had dated back in college, but Darren always called her up for important events such as this, because he knew a true straight actor would have a woman by his side in those situations, even if he wasn't dating anyone.

"And you look incredibly handsome," she said, reaching out to lay her hands on his chest, making his stomach drop a little. "Shall we go?" Mia grinned at him as she took hold of Darren's arm. Darren forced a smile, suddenly nervous, and led her outside towards their limo. It was going to be a long night.

The limo stopped and Darren looked out the heavily tinted window at the bright red carpet that spread across the ground under the hundreds of interviewers and photographers and onlookers that stood behind barriers and security guards. Lots of celebrities were already there and being piled around the roped barriers with cameras flashing at them and microphones being shoved in their faces. Darren swallowed the lump in his throat. He hated the media, that was for sure. They had no boundaries; they didn't care about the celebrities' personal feelings or what they may not want to share. All they cared about was the money, and they knew that if someone of large prominence on that carpet slipped up and told them something deep or personal, they could exploit them and their salaries would shoot skyward. _Sickening,_ Darren thought.

He was pulled back to reality when Mia tugged at his arm. "Ok, Boo. You ready?"

Darren took a deep breath, looked over at Mia and nodded. "As much as I'll ever be."

His publicist had explained to him that he could talk about his reaction to the latest episode, but nothing else regarding Glee. Darren made a mental note to only talk about his reaction to the episode itself, not about shooting it. _That_ would not blow over well.

Mia smiled at him and kissed him on the cheek, making his stomach do that funny drop again. He knew they had to show enough PDA to look like a couple at this thing, but did they have to do it while they were still inside the limo? But he lost his train of thought as his publicist opened the car door to let them out, letting the flashes of cameras and the cheers of fans and paparazzi flood in. Darren blinked as he got out, then turned around and helped Mia to her feet. The sequins on her black dress sparkled as the cameras turned towards the pair of them. "Darren Criss has just arrived!" He heard a man commenting in front of a video camera. Darren summoned his best photo-smile as they walked down the carpet, between the two crowded rows of shouting photographers and screaming fans.

Pretty soon, he and Mia had to part ways so they could pose by themselves in front of the large wall meant for professional photographs. Darren hated this part almost as much as the interviews. As the cameras got more and more high-tech each year, the flashes got brighter and brighter. This year, it only took a few snaps to blind him completely. He closed his eyes after a moment and shook his head, trying to rid the bright patches of light in front of his eyes that whitened his vision. After a few more minutes of this torture, the photographers finally gave him a break and he was able to move toward the interviewers' section. As soon as he got there, people began shouting his name for him to come and talk. He walked up to the first microphone he could find.

"Hi Darren!" The interviewer shouted way too loud for his liking, grinning from ear to ear. She held the microphone up to his face.

"Hey," He replied, trying not to sound annoyed but rather enthusiastic. "How's it going?"

"Very good, thank you! Let's talk about last Tuesday's episode! I mean, how crazy was that? Your character Blaine and Chris Colfer's Kurt decide to take things to the next level and have sex for the first time. How did you feel about that?"

Darren thought a moment. _Don't screw this up._ "I mean, it wasn't all that bad, clearly they didn't show anything explicit, which is good." _Smooth, Darren._ "I don't know, I think it might have done some good for people to see that. It's no secret that kids are having sex in high school, but with Kurt and Blaine's relationship, it wasn't really about the sex, it was about their love for each other. I think that's something people will appreciate, because yes it was two boys having sex, but it really showed that they love each other and meant something to them."

"Mhmm," The interviewer hummed when she brought the microphone back to herself. "So, what about shooting that scene? Was it scary, or what?"

_Shit._ Not even five minutes into an interview and the one subject he wanted to avoid was already being brought up. "Uh…" he stumbled through the words in his mind. He had to lie. "It just felt like work, you know? It was just a scene like any other scene, and once I tapped into Blaine mode it went pretty smoothly." _Ha,_ he thought to himself. _Maybe if I HAD tapped into Blaine mode it would have gone over smoothly._

The interviewer seemed a little disappointed at his answer, but let him go with it. Each interview afterwards was about the same:_ What did you think of the content of last Tuesday's episode? How nerve-racking was the shooting? What can we expect with episodes to come? _The latter he successfully avoided, making the excuse that he'd be fired if he were to give out any spoilers. It was kind of true, actually.

By the time Darren finally squeezed past all the interviewers and photographers and video cameras, he found Mia already sitting at their table. He joined her and looked around the table, noticing that most of the Glee cast had not gotten through the red carpet yet.

"Hey, babe," Mia greeted him, leaning in to kiss him on the lips. Figuring that there was probably at least one camera on them, Darren kissed her back. He knew it would look odd if he pulled back when his "girlfriend" was kissing him.

But kissing Mia was strange. Back in college when they dated, he felt just fine kissing her. Her kisses were soft and warm, but they always lacked something. Now, he realized, it was the masculinity that he needed in a kiss; a strong mouth sliding on his, muscled arms encircling his body, deep, guttural moans elicited against his lips. Mia clearly just didn't have that.

Throughout the evening, Darren and Mia showed enough PDA every once in a while so the media doesn't get suspicious. Darren pretended to be enjoying himself, but it just felt plain wrong. Mia, after all, wasn't Chris, whom Darren could kiss all night and day if he had the time. When he kissed Chris, there was no question about it. Their lips fit together with perfection, and every need Darren had ever had would become fulfilled when he was in Chris' arms. That's just the way it was.

He looked over and spotted Chris talking to an interviewer. Darren watched him from his seat, admiring the trademark smile and adorable laugh that could still be heard over the noisy crowd. He smiled to himself. That man was truly perfect, everything Darren had wanted in a boyfriend and lover. He wanted more than anything at that moment to go up Chris and kiss him on the cheek and hold him in his arms. Darren wanted to tell that gorgeous boy that he loved him, but he also knew that wasn't possible.

And he did love Chris, truly he did; but he just couldn't ignore all the video and photography cameras, the microphones, any and all journalistic equipment that meant that they were being watched and heard and recorded, and that anything said or done in such a public place would be all over the media in no time at all. A single man's career, theoretically, could be destroyed in a matter of hours.

The thought scared Darren to the point that when he looked at Chris in such a crowded place as this, he didn't actually see Chris; instead, he saw all the hundreds of possibilities that his secret could get loose, that his entire ego and pride could crash and burn. And when he looked at Chris while they were each surrounded by camera lights flashing in their eyes and audio equipment being pushed in their faces, his heart did a funny drop in his chest, like he knew there was no way they could be together in the face of the media like Lea and Cory could, or even like Darren could be with Mia. Yes, he loved Chris with all his heart, but his mind took over in situations like this and when it came to being rational, his entire relationship with Chris was irrational, especially to the eyes of the world.

So, they couldn't tell anyone; although, it really wasn't all that bad. It was just his personal life, after all. And when considering everything else about Darren—Co-founder of Team Starkid, Talented and Popular Musician/Song Writer, Breakout Star from the hit show Glee—his personal life really didn't seem all that important. Besides, what mattered was his goal in life, his goal for equality, and to achieve that would mean focusing nearly 100% on his career anyway. So, he would continue to sacrifice his personal life—his real self, his and Chris' true relationship, his absolute love for Chris—for his goal, because he knew that was the least selfish thing to do. That was what mattered.

Darren blinked back to reality as another wave of applause erupted from the crowd, celebrating another person's Emmy win. He wasn't paying attention to any of the winners, as selfish as that was. He couldn't take his eyes off Chris, who was now sitting in his designated chair a few tables away, and his heart leapt in his chest every so often when Chris would turn to glance his way, a shy smile appearing on his face.

Mia was getting a little restless beside him. They hadn't showed any PDA in the past ten minutes, and it seemed to be bothering her a lot more than it would bother the media. "Darren!" she shouted over the applause, putting down her third glass of wine in attempt to get his attention.

Darren looked over at her, then immediately wished he hadn't. Mia reached out and pulled his face toward hers, crashing their lips together. He almost gagged as her alcohol-soaked tongue forced its way past his lips, but he kept his composure enough to regretfully kiss her back. No doubt people were looking over at them, and he heard a few '_Aww'_s coming from around the table as his cast mates beamed at them. When Darren opened his eyes for a brief moment, time slowed down as he saw Chris looking over at them from his table. His mouth was slightly open and his eyes showed several different emotions. It wasn't like he was angry at Darren; they'd talked briefly a few days ago about how he and Mia needed to go together to this event, and he knew Chris completely understood what that would mean. But the look Chris gave him wasn't of anger; it was of jealousy.

Finally, Mia let go of Darren's face and broke the kiss for them to breathe. He gave her a weak smile and quickly took a big gulp of his wine. Looking up, he was pleased to see that the Emmys were coming to a close, and people were already getting ready to leave for the after party.

Darren and Mia got up and made their way to the exit. Just before they could make it outside, Chris appeared at Darren's side and began tugging him away from Mia. "I'll meet you in the limo," Darren called to Mia just in time before Chris successfully pulled him inside the nearest bathroom. He shut the door and pushed Darren up against it.

"You can't just do that," Chris growled in his ear, his voice dripping with arousal. His fingernails dug into the thick fabric of the suit covering Darren's chest. "You can't make out with your fake fucking girlfriend in front of me like that. You don't understand what you do to me, Dare."

Darren looked deep into Chris' dark eyes. He couldn't help the smirk that settled on his lips. "What do you want from me, Chris?" He asked, surprising himself with how low his voice already was.

Chris groaned out as Darren pulled his hips toward him. "I want you, Darren. I _need _you. You aren't going to that after party. After you drop off Mia at wherever the hell she lives, you're going home. I'll be waiting." And with that, Chris pulled Darren off the door, opened it, and disappeared into the hustling crowd outside.

After standing dumbly transfixed for quite some time, Darren did as he was told, finding Mia after he exited the bathroom and leading her back to the limo. He ordered the driver to go to Mia's house, then explained to her that he was feeling way too tired to go to the after party. "Oh," she said, looking disappointed. "I guess that's ok, at least I got to go to the awards part. Thanks, sweetie." Darren allowed her one last kiss goodnight, not wanting to tell her just yet about his real sexuality. Sure, Mia was accepting to the LGBT community, but she didn't take too well to people that lied to her, especially for as long as Darren had been. Plus, he could tell she still wanted to be with him.

After Mia left the limo when it pulled up to her house, Darren directed the driver back to his house. When they arrived, he noticed Chris' car already pulled into the driveway. Adrenaline began pumping through his veins as he tipped the driver and climbed out of the limo. He practically ran inside his own house. When he opened the door and stepped inside, he found Chris sitting on the couch, still in his suit from the awards show.

"About time," Chris deadpanned, smirking up at Darren. The second he stood up, Darren was on him. He swung his arms around Chris' waist and pulled him close, crashing their lips together, loving how Chris' lips tasted like Diet Coke and were nothing like Mia's. He led Chris to his bedroom, lips still attached, and threw him down on the bed. He climbed on top of him and allowed Chris' tongue access into his mouth. They made out passionately on the bed for what felt like forever. "Oh, god," Chris moaned when they pulled apart for air. "Darren, you can't possibly know how desperately I needed you. Back there, at that crowded ceremony, I wanted so bad to be on your lips, tasting you in front of everybody... Mia doesn't deserve you." His voice drifted at the last part, going quiet.

Darren looked down into Chris' pleading eyes and felt a pang of guilt. He'd made Chris go through all that, watching him make out with Mia, not letting anyone know that it was actually Chris that he loved. "Chris," Darren said gently, stroking the younger man's cheek, "I'm so sorry. You shouldn't have had to go through that. It was wrong of me to bring Mia, so next time I won't. I love you so much, and I never want to hurt you."

Chris' eyes sparkled, and he brought Darren's face down to his and kissed him gently. "It's ok, Darren," he spoke against his lips. "I know that you had to look like a couple, and I was prepared to see what I did. I love you too, forever and always."

Darren smiled and kissed Chris again, moaning a little against his mouth. He dipped his hips down against Chris', loving the friction created between them and the way Chris writhed beneath him. He began kissing down his beautiful, pale neck. "Chris," Darren said again, panting this time and barely above a whisper in his ear, "I… I want you inside me. I need to feel you in me; I want you so bad…"

Chris pulled Darren off his neck and looked him in the eye. "Are you sure?" He asked quietly, eyebrows raised in concern. "We've never done that before…"

"I want to try. I trust you." Darren promised him. Chris stared back at him for a few moments, and then nodded.

"Ok", he said, and in one quick motion he flipped them over so Darren was on his back and Chris was settled between his legs. He bent down over Darren's body and caught his lips in a fierce, loving kiss. Darren brought his hands up to cup Chris' face, moaning out at the way his spine tingled when Chris cocked his head to the side to deepen the kiss. Warm hands traced gentle patterns along the skin on Darren's chest, arms, and down to rest on his thighs. "Too many clothes," Chris panted out when they broke apart.

Darren nodded and began tugging Chris' suit off while Chris worked on Darren's waistband. Soon all their clothes were piled at the foot of Darren's bed, and neither one cared about how expensive it would be if their rented suits were ruined. Chris pushed Darren back into the mattress and continued kissing him, trailing his lips from his mouth down to his neck and chest, making sure to leave enough marks on Darren's skin to remember this night for days to come.

Chris sat up a little and reached out for the drawer in Darren's side table where the lube was kept. He squirted a little on his fingers, then recapped the bottle and tossed it aside. He moved his body so he hovered over Darren's bottom half. "Ok, Darren, this is going to feel… different," Chris told him, biting his lip in concern. Darren could tell that he was worried about hurting him. "I promise, I'll go slowly."

Darren just nodded, not being able to move his mouth to form coherent words at the moment. He trusted Chris with his life, but he couldn't get over the fact of what they were about to do. Chris was right; they'd never done it _this_ way before. He remembered their first time, and how Chris was so tight and tried his best to relax around Darren. He could tell it hurt him, at least in the beginning, and now Chris was afraid of doing the same to Darren.

He shivered when he felt Chris' cold, lubed-up finger rub around his entrance. Chris slowly slid the first finger inside the tight ring of muscle, and Darren let out a gasp at the feeling. It _was_ different, but it didn't hurt, at least not yet. Honestly, he figured Chris _couldn't_ hurt him; he was too careful, too graceful with his movements to ever harm a soul, which is why the inevitable pain he felt when Chris slid in a second finger surprised him.

"I'm so sorry, Dare," Chris whispered and rubbed his hip soothingly as Darren winced in pain. "I'm trying not to hurt you, it's just—God, you're so tight. But you're doing good, Darren, you're _so_ good."

Darren began to relax around Chris' fingers, and nodded for Chris to start moving again. Before long, both fingers were fully sheathed inside him, and Darren couldn't help the cry he let out when Chris crooked his fingers so the tips met his prostate. "Chris! Oh, god…"

He began whimpering in pleasure as Chris worked his fingers inside of him. After adding a third slick finger, Chris shifted his weight so he hovered over Darren, one elbow propped up to support him. Darren had to close his eyes at the sensations Chris was making him feel. He opened them several moments later, and looked up deep into Chris' eyes. "Please," was all he could say between moans, but the younger man still got the idea and nodded, leaning down to kiss him quickly on the lips. He pulled his fingers out slowly, but Darren still groaned at the loss.

Chris took the bottle of lube and dripped some over his cock. After a few quick pumps, his length was coated and shiny with lube, and he positioned himself so he was hovering over Darren again, his cock an inch from his entrance. He waited until Darren gave him a nod of approval before pushing the tip against his hole, easing himself forward until the tip was inside. Darren threw his head back and moaned loudly. Chris was so much bigger than he'd expected, and he shut his eyes again as he was filled up.

He began whimpering for more, and Chris dropped his head to swallow Darren's quiet murmurs with his own mouth. "Shhhh, Dare," he whispered against his lips when his dick slid all the way in, making the older man gasp and whimper beneath him. "I've got you, baby, I've got you."

Darren wanted to cry at how incredibly gentle and loving Chris was being. He wasn't hurting at all anymore, and Chris' thick length inside him was doing things to him that he couldn't even begin to describe. _Was I nearly this gentle to Chris the first time?_ He asked himself, recalling that night and remembering how quickly Chris got over the pain and was eager for more. It was an amazing night, and Chris had said it felt fantastic, but _this…_ What Chris was doing to him, he suddenly wished he'd gone at the same slow pace for Chris the first time. This way, he could feel every little movement Chris made inside him, every little kiss he showered onto his face, every soft-spoken word against his lips.

When his dick was fully inside Darren, Chris stilled his movements. He brought one hand up to push away the curls that lay on Darren's sweat-soaked forehead and press a single kiss there. Darren opened his eyes and looked up at Chris, who was watching him with a big, loving gaze. His heart leapt in his chest not for the first time that night, just knowing that this man loved him every bit as much as Darren loved him back.

"Move—pl-please, move," Darren whispered to his lover, his voice deep and raspy. Chris nodded, smiling down at him, and gently brought his hips back. Once he was nearly all the way out, Chris thrust entirely back inside him, still careful not to hurt him. Darren let out a groan and his eyes went back into his head as Chris' dick pushed up against his prostate perfectly. He arched his back so their chests collided, and Chris wrapped his arms around Darren's waist to keep him close.

Darren couldn't stop the sounds that escaped his lips. He was caught between wanting to fuck himself down further on Chris' length, or buck his hips upward towards the much-needed friction for his dick between their bodies. He'd never felt so alive; _this_ is what it is like to be fucked, but more than anything, this was making love. He reached up and tugged on Chris' hair, pulling him into a heated, messy kiss with tongue and teeth and hot breaths. They groaned into each other's mouths; neither had felt this way before, and it somehow made them feel impossibly closer to each other.

Chris shifted his body upwards slightly, so Darren's thighs were spread further apart. Darren hooked his legs together around Chris' waist, allowing Chris better access and deeper thrusts into him. He was now pumping inside him at a much faster speed, his head bent down to nip at Darren's exposed neck, kissing his Adams apple when he swallowed. Darren's hands were tangled in Chris' hair, pulling him closer to his neck. Chris rubbed Darren's sides soothingly, and then moved one hand to his cock, which was throbbing and leaking pre-come against Darren's stomach.

"Fuck, Chris, I—I'm close," Darren panted against Chris' shoulder as his strong hand pumped Darren's dick with the same rhythm of his thrusts.

"Come for me, Darren," Chris pleaded, nibbling at the shell of his ear, "Do it. Come for me."

Darren's scream was muffled by Chris' mouth when he came, shooting all over Chris' hand and his own stomach. He groaned loudly when his head dropped back onto the pillow, his body squirming as the waves of pleasure overcame him, and in no time at all he felt Chris follow him over the edge, biting down on Darren's shoulder as his come filled him up. Chris pumped Darren through his orgasm and thrust himself through his before finally relaxing and falling over his boyfriend's limp body.

Darren breathed heavily, staring up at the ceiling, aware of every little detail about their joined bodies and Chris still throbbing inside him. His arms encircled Chris' waist and he leaned up to gently kiss his forehead. "That… that was…"

"Yeah," Chris breathed. He opened his eyes to meet Darren's, his face shiny with sweat and flushed with afterglow and so beautiful all at once. Darren reached up and pet Chris' hair away from his face, beaming at him, basking in the sheer closeness and love of what they had just done. "Yeah, it was."


	9. Chapter 9

"_Recap of Glee's 'The First Time' episode…"_

"…_this is quite a risky storyline for the musical comedy show…"_

"…_wow, is all I have to say…"_

"…_what a horrid topic to cover…"_

"…_it was very well written, just beautiful…"_

"…_disgusting, absolutely disgusting…"_

Chris slammed his laptop closed and took a big breath. It was Sunday, five whole days since Tuesday's episode, and the internet was _still_ buzzing and gossiping and criticizing the "gay guys losing their virginities" storyline. Sure, there were blogs with pleasant reviews of the entire episode who praised him and Darren for their work, but the articles that stood out to Chris were the ones that upset him most. "Awful." "Gross." "Anti-Christ." "Wrong." The words stung him each time he read them as they stabbed at his mind and stomach a lot more powerfully than the kinder comments did. Chris knew very well that the episode was extremely well-written and that any review or analysis that described it with bitter terms was clearly written by a homophobe, but still, why the fuck do people watch things that make them angry or disgusted and then go write horrible things about it online? There's never any real motive other than to be cruel.

At least it was Sunday, the casts' day off. This meant that he and Darren could be together in privacy the entire day without the risk of video cameras recording them or paparazzi snapping photographs of them. _Today,_ he thought, _will be just us._

His phone buzzed across the table on the other side of the room. Chris smiled to himself as he walked towards it, already knowing who it was from.

_From: Darren_

_Hey babe, I'm going to run a few errands real quick before coming over. Also, what movie should I rent for tonight? I'm kind of in a musical-watching mood, what about you?_

Chris chewed his lip as he thought for a moment, trying to remember the names to all his favorite musicals. Finally, he texted back:

_Hmmm, see if The _Producers_ is available. I could really use a good laugh right about now._

Darren's reply came a few minutes later.

_Why is that? Is something wrong?_

Sighing, Chris texted back, telling him that he would explain everything when he got to his house. He really didn't want to try to describe the hatred in the pit of his stomach that he felt for those critics who wrote shitty things about the latest episode.

_I just need to take my mind off these things,_ Chris figured. He decided to hop in the shower before Darren showed up. Just as he was getting out and pulling a towel around his waist, he heard the doorbell ring. He looked down, shrugged at his appearance, and went to the front door to answer.

"Hey, Chr—_woah." _Darren's eyes got big as he looked Chris' half-naked and slightly wet body up and down, hands full with a box of pizza and the movie rental. "Well _hello, _Chris!" he said, his parted lips curved up into a playful smirk.

Chris snorted. "Come on in, you dork." He took the pizza from Darren's hands and set it on the kitchen counter. Darren followed him into the house and, after shutting the door, walked up behind Chris and nuzzled himself against his back.

"I missed you," he breathed warmly onto Chris' shoulder, causing him to shiver. Darren smelled of coffee and mint gum, and Chris smiled at the thought of being back in Darren's arms.

"I missed you too," Chris laughed lightly, turning in his boyfriend's arms to face him. He leaned in and gave a seductive peck to Darren's lips before whispering against them, "But I just showered, so you're not getting any anytime soon."

Groaning exhaustedly, Darren leaned his forehead against Chris' and looked up, giving Chris his biggest puppy eyes. "No…?"

Chris kissed the tip of his nose, giggling. "Nope. Sorry, dude. I'm going to go get some clothes on while you pop the movie in."

"Fiiiiiiiine," Darren whined, then muttered under his breath, "I'd rather pop something else in," but didn't complain any further as he watched Chris disappear into his bedroom, hips swaying teasingly. He knew very well that Darren was just happy to be _them_ again, after having to pretend for at least the majority of each day. Work was crazy busy, trying to shoot a few episodes at once to prepare for the hiatus, and each day the two of them would leave too drained to do anything but say goodnight. They'd had fun last night after having to pretend at the Emmys, but today was different. Finally, they had the full day to just _be_, whether that meant crazy hot sex in random places around Chris' house, or just cuddling on the couch watching a movie.

Chris came out of his bedroom a minute later in a simple T-shirt and jeans to find Darren plopped haphazardly on the couch, watching the previews on the flat screen TV. Grinning, Chris sprang onto the couch and effectively smothered his boyfriend, who let out a loud "_Oomph" _as he was pinned to the cushions.

"Hi," Chris giggled above him, leaning down and kissing his mouth, this time much harder than a simple peck on the lips. Darren squirmed beneath him before reciprocating the kiss, lips stretched into a smile against Chris' because he just couldn't help it.

Chris broke apart from Darren's lips and breathed in a pleasant sigh, his fingers curling playfully into Darren's hair. "Love you."

Darren grinned back up at him, his eyelashes fanning over his warm hazel eyes beautifully. "Love you, too."

A few minutes later, the movie itself had started playing and Chris' head lay on Darren's stomach as they watched. Chris smiled to himself, content with the perfection of this moment, and nuzzled closer into Darren's shirt, letting the rise and dip of his belly underneath Chris' head relax him. He was about to drift off into sleep when he heard Darren's phone vibrate loudly on the coffee table, signaling an incoming text.

He had just enough time to read the letters on the screen before Darren picked it up to answer, his stomach immediately twisting painfully at the name. _Mia._

Chris tried not to be too obvious when he shifted his head to get a better look at Darren's expression when he read the text. He watched in horror as Darren swallowed, his Adam's apple bobbing noticeably as he stared at the words on his phone. After a moment of hesitation, he tapped out a rather lengthy reply, then locked his phone up again but kept it in his palm instead of setting it back down on the coffee table. His eyes returned to the television screen, but it was clear from his distracted look that his focus was still on the text.

Anxious, Chris leaned up a little so that he was propped up on an elbow. "Darren, sweetie…?" He asked carefully.

Darren blinked, as if coming back to reality, regarding Chris with a dazed look. "Uh—what?"

"Who was that from?" Chris asked innocently, resisting the urge to say, _What the HELL does SHE want?_ He gave his boyfriend a tiny smile and looked pointedly at his phone.

Darren's mouth opened to answer, and then kind of just hung there for a brief hesitation, as if he could already see the danger of the situation being played out before him if he told. He must have found no better option. "Mia," he answered finally, his tone and expression suddenly a false nonchalance, as if he were trying to convince both Chris and himself that it was _no big deal_ that his possessive ex-girlfriend just texted him.

Chris knew better.

"Oh," he said, like this was news to him, and he could already feel anger begin to flare up in his blood even before he asked the question that he knew would not receive a good answer: "What did she say?"

Darren's thin mask of unconcern could not camouflage the _Oh, shit_ look that spread over his face. He knew better than to lie to Chris. He knew better than to tell Chris the truth, too, but he really didn't have much of a choice with Chris lying half on top of him, looking about ready to pounce to get the phone out of his hands.

"She… Uh, she said—look, Chris, it's nothing, really it means nothing—"

_Bullshit,_ Chris thought right before he pounced. He scrambled on top of Darren, reaching for his phone as they became a tangle of limbs. Darren tried to protest, but like it or not, Chris was bigger than him, and he easily pinned Darren's arms down with his elbows and snatched the phone out of his right hand.

"_Chris!_ Shit—please, don't take what she says seriously," Darren pleaded as Chris unlocked the phone and read the message.

_From: Mia_

_Hey sexy, last night was fun! I wanted to thank you again soooooooo much for taking me to the Emmys. Speaking of fun, I felt like our time together last night was kind of cut short because you said you were tired. Well, now that you're all rested up… wanna meet up today and have some REAL fun? XOXO_

Chris' jaw clenched at the words. '_WHORE'_ was the word that his mind instinctually screamed. Sure, he knew that Mia didn't know Darren's secret—and from her perspective, Darren was single and available—but _still_. Her desperation just disgusted him. He wanted nothing more than to type out his own reply to that _skank, _but his own common sense reminded him that any nastiness with Mia would danger revealing his and Darren's secret. Still huffing and glaring at the screen, Chris scrolled down a little on the phone and read Darren's reply.

_Sorry Mia, I can't. I'm at Chris' house today with a few of the other cast members. We kind of just wanted to chill today, you know? I'd really appreciate it if you would understand, since work has been exhausting and all. Maybe another time._

This put Chris a little at ease. _A smart white lie,_ he thought. Mia wouldn't suspect anything with Darren at Chris' house if there were other people involved. He was also relieved to remember that he could trust Darren, and that he had the power to keep Mia at bay while still playing nice.

Chris' jaw unclenched a little as he said, "Ok, this might not be so bad."

Darren rose his eyebrows. "Really? I thought that you'd be pissed—"

"Oh, I _am,_" he clarified. "But only at that bi—er, Mia's desperation to get back with you. I mean, _God_, she's annoying! But other than that, it's not that bad because I know that as long as you keep her away from you—from _us_—she won't find out what's happening between the two of us."

Chris gave his boyfriend a small smile as he returned his phone back to him. He then reached up and stroked his cheek gently, looking deep into those gorgeous hazel eyes. "Darren, I trust you a hundred times more than I trust her. We've just got to stay smart about this, ok?"

Darren glanced down at his phone, then back up to Chris' gaze before finally allowing himself to smile. "Ok," he whispered, then added after a moment of staring into those shiny blue eyes, "And, Chris—I'm so sorry about all of this…about her. You're right, she's desperate, and this isn't the first time. It's why I broke up with her back when we dated in college, because she was clingy and things just got so nasty… I don't want you to have to deal with her at all. That's why I didn't want you to see the text in the first place, but now that you did… Just know that I really don't want her back. I'm with you, I'm _in love_ with you, and—let's face it—I'm gayer than men's fashion in 17th century Europe."

Chris couldn't help but laugh at that. "Oh, you know I'm a sucker for European history!" he said between giggles.

Darren grinned, loving the sound of his boyfriend's adorable laugh. He grabbed Chris around the waist and pulled him back down to the couch so he could press their lips together. Chris' laughter subsided and he hummed against Darren's mouth, turning his head and parting his lips to allow Darren's tongue inside.

A moan erupted from one of them as their arms wrapped around the other, Chris' hands tangling in Darren's hair once again, and Darren's fingers tracing circles onto the skin where Chris' shirt had been tugged up a little. Their tongues dueled passionately for several minutes before Chris pulled back by a centimeter to speak, allowing Darren to stare hungrily at his shiny, kiss-bitten lips.

"Maybe that shower was…a little premature," Chris whispered breathlessly before leaning down and capturing Darren's lips once again. Darren hummed in agreement at the hint.

"Yes, definitely," he said between kisses. "We should—mhh—maybe take this into your room."

Chris approved of this suggestion and scrambled off the couch, pulling Darren up with him so he could reattach their lips. He cupped the sides of Darren's face and felt his stomach swoop at how deliciously rough the stubble that lined his jaw was under his fingertips.

Strong hands positioned themselves back at Chris' waist and pushed him slightly in the direction of his own bedroom. The two made out of the living room and into the main hallway, still tangled together and chasing each other's lips. They were both moaning loudly, maybe too loudly, causing neither one of them to hear the soft click of a door handle being turned.

"_Darren_," Chris whimpered onto his boyfriend's lips when his hands reached down to grab Chris' ass.

"Shit, Chris! I _need _you, I need—"

"_OH MY GOD."_

Both boys broke apart abruptly at the voice, hearts pounding in their chests loud enough for the neighbors to hear. Chris' eyes flicked immediately to the front door and the color drained from his face. _"Shit."_

The door, which Chris realized with a pang must have remained unlocked after Darren had entered his house, was open. To his absolute horror, there in the doorway stood Mia Swier, her jaw hanging nearly low enough to touch the floor.

"Yeah," she managed after a terribly long, awkward silence. Her eyes shifted between the two boys, and Chris swore he saw an angry gleam in them when her gaze landed on him. "'Shit' is right."


End file.
